<body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/platform.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar/7074329?origin\x3dhttps://celticdream.blogspot.com', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe" }); } }); </script> The Confessions of an Escapist v3
Sunday, May 28, 2006
10:08 PM

I.

Am.

So.

Fucking.

SAD.

Today Hanif and I trooped down to the Concierge at Raffles City to book tickets for the Coldplay concert. Alas, all seats were SOLD OUT. Tickets were only available for the free standing area (which in our opinion is too havoc) and so we were forced to leave empty handed.

I am so fucking disappointed. To think that I was so looking forward to the concert!

That aside though, I was glad I got to meet up with Hanif and Gary today. We watched X3, and had a 3 hour dinner at Seoul Garden, and slacked at the Esplanade. Its hard to believe that I've known these two guys for eight years now. They're the kind of people I could easily talk to about my problems. And there are few people I talk to about my problems in the first place. I don't trust people so easily now, after all that I've been through in the past year and a half. What I've learnt is that true friendship is one that survives the test of time. I value these friends of mine who've stuck by me for nearly half of my life.

To be frank, I'm not the kind of person who takes pride in having extensive contacts and a wide and active social circle. Fact is, I have a small social circle and an even smaller number of contacts. I can count with my two hands the number of close friends I have, but I know these are the poeple I can rely on. These are the people who are still going to be my friends ten years down the road.

And I'm just thankful I have these people to turn to. Fuck friendster, and posers, and all that acquaintance shit.

Wednesday, May 17, 2006
11:12 PM

I just deleted my friendster account about a few minutes ago. I simply couldn't bear to be a part of that fake, vile thing any longer. Good riddance. If you must contact me, call my mobile- I answer all calls nowadays- or you can drop me a message on MSN (harder to find me there, I spend alot of my O/L time gaming and not on MSN).

Am still recovering from a darn fever. I realised I haven't exercised in months. I've put on more than the 10Kg I lost during my BMT days. I'm fat, tired and depressed.

Working in Coast Guard has definitely made me wiser and more street-smart. At least, I can brace myself for the oddities and absurdities of the working world. Not to mention all the drama and politics and backstabbing. Hey, I've been fucking stabbed in the back here, right?

I don't know what to look forward to anymore. Is school really the light at the end of the tunnel? Will I be able to make it in University? Do I even want to work? Everyone around me has sorted out their plans and ambitions for their lives to some extent. I, on the other hand, am going nowhere. I don't want to be a slave to money. And I don't want to work for some boss, I detest order and government. And I most certainly don't want to be holed up in some cubicle in an office. I don't want to raise children. Who gives a shit about "carrying on the family name"? What is a family name worth anyway? All humans are gonna perish someday anyway. And besides the world isn't becoming any better a place to live in. Look at what is happening around us. Countries ehancing their nuclear capabilities; eternal strife in the Middle East, arms races, tsunamis, and most recently Mount Merapi erupting again. We're going up in flames. Might as well spare future embryos a chance and not force them into this horrible world.

What then, am I looking forward to? Ah, as much the cynic and hypocrite I am, I am still a hopeless romantic at heart. I'm looking forward to spending time with someone I can grow old with. Someone I can talk to for ages and not get bored. Someone to snuggle up in bed with.

The One. Is yet to be found. Am not searching extensively though. The one will come when the one comes.

What kind of qualities must The One possess, you may ask.

Well for one thing, she must not be into soccer. I abhor soccer. Am fed up of all those world cup advertisements eating into my tv programmes' airtime. Grr.

On a completely unrelated note, I'm planning to get myself a goatee after I ORD. Lol.

Alright. Am making no sense at all right now. G'night.